Thursday, September 17, 2009

Pick a Guy for my Sister

Please choose which one of these guys my sister should date. She's looking for love.

My brother votes for Fred.

Wednesday, April 08, 2009

The CoinStar Stimulus

I'm going to make a crazy statement, but that's what I generally do when I have free time:

Coinstar (makers of coin-counting kiosks you might find in your grocery store) has done more to stimulate the economy than Obama, Pelosi, and Reid could ever do.

More than anything, economies grow on the movement of money. This is often referred to as "Velocity of Money" or the average frequency with which a unit of money is spent in a specific period of time.

That means that the best way to stimulate the economy is to get people to BUY things. When people BUY, that allows someone else to have a JOB... which gives them money to go BUY things. And the cycle continues. The best way to create jobs is to buy stuff. And, it shouldn't be the government's job.

Coinstar estimated in 2008 that $10 BILLION dollars in coins are sitting in jars. That money is STAGNANT... doing nothing. It is all legal tender. And, the government keeps minting more coins based on the estimate of how many are in circulation... and only about 15% of those make it out of your coin jar.

So, if somebody has $200 in coins in their jar, it is currently doing NOTHING. If they walk to their local grocery store and drop it in a Coinstar machine, they now have $200 they can easily spend (either 100% on a gift card like or iTunes or 90% of it on groceries). Coinstar then puts the coins back in circulation, depositing them in a bank. That bank now has a higher deposit reserve, which allows it to loan money to a dude with a small business idea. Dude borrows money, starts a business, creates jobs.

Now, we've created a job for the Coinstar guy, the bank, Amazon or iTunes, the Grocery Store, and the dude that created the small business.

Doesn't this make sense to anybody??

Obama and Pelosi are spending money they don't HAVE on programs that don't really NEED to be funded right now. They don't get money back into businesses and pockets where it can do real work.

So... do you want to stimulate the economy? Create jobs? Help your fellow man?

Go get that coin jar off your dresser. Take it to your bank (if you are lucky enough to have a bank with a coin counter) or to your local grocery store Coinstar machine (they're bright green). Use the money you get to buy something you NEED on, iTunes, AMC THeaters, Borders Books, Cabelas, CVS, Lowe's, Starbucks... or at the grocery store where you got the coins counted.

And, in the process, you will help get us out of an economic funk. You'll infuse more than $10 billion into the economy in the RIGHT places.

And, once you've done that, go ask your Grandma if she has any coins... because she is much more likely to have them. Use those coins to buy her groceries.

Stop saving coins... save the world.

Of course, if your Coinstar machine looks like this creepy guy, think twice:

Or, we could just sit back and hope Obama fixes all our woes by borrowing more money than Bush EVER did to fund programs that I don't want funded.

I want jobs for the helpless and hopeless. I don't want handouts to the clueless.

Thank you Coinstar.

That is all.


Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Pure Brilliance: True Hollywood Stories

Ok... Dave Chapelle had some absolute moments of pure brilliance. Of course, those were interspersed with moments of insanely offensive junk.

But, this was one of the episodes of True Hollywood Stories with Charlie Murphy (Eddie Murphy's brother... no... really).

Get a tissue... because you'll be crying with laughter by the end.

Chappelle's Show
True Hollywood Stories - Prince
Charlie Murphy VideosBuy Chappelle's Show DVDsBlack Comedy

Sunday, February 15, 2009

This is how I feel about the Stimulus Bill...

Yep... I feel that angry when "stimulus" is just going to screw us up even more. Thank you Nancy Pelosi.